If you know it you know it, if you don’t know it, you sure as hell should. The Lame Duck is, to put it mildly…actually, screw mildly cause the Lame Duck does. The Lame Duck is a mushroom induced fever dream filled to the top with a Miami shirt wearing, cross-dressing, pink hat pumping, rocky horror picture show having, Cher loving 70’s spunk.
It’s kitsch if kitsch was Cher in sparkling boxing gloves hitting you across the face on a rainbow sprinkled with 70’s and 80’s movie stars all drinking out of wibbly-wobbly cocktail glasses while the Bee Gees dressed like actual bees are singing Staying Alive.
We would say at this point, “How’d you like the metaphors?”, but we’d be lying. There are no metaphors when it comes to the Lame Duck, just a fun as hell time with a crew up for pretty much anything and a never-ending music beat that keeps your feet very much so, staying alive.
It’s like a cross between a biker bar, a gamers lounge and……ah hell, if we’re trying to describe the Lame Duck anymore we’ll be here all day.
Needless to say, it’s the Roadhouse of fun.
It’s a dive bar, set with pool, ping ball machines and disco music. Special event DJ’s are an all too usual occurrence, and you’ll always find a friend willing to do a shot with you, talk about some out of the world experience or just hang with a really sweet tasting, tongue curling, knee bending cocktail.
Stepping off Gertrude Street you can’t help but feel like a retro Willy Wonka, or some Cher version of him should be waiting for you in front of those golden doors. “Come on in, baby” she whispers, and the doors pull open and you step inside, and you never seem to leave again. Hotel California eat your heart out. Wooden panelling along the walls, hot-pink zebra-striped doors, colours you knew, colours you were yet to imagine and the drinks just keep on coming.
If you like singalongs, they got ’em. Funk and soul? Friday fever. Yacht rock? Saturday night, baby. Ten buck all-day Margaritas on Sundays or try the signature Lame Fluffy Duck cocktail while munching on a four-cheese toastie with crisps.
We funkily, groovily, soulfully, Tom Cruise cocktaily, Dolly Parton fantastically, roadhouse majestically, velvet coveredly, up against the zebra stripedly recommend The Lame Duck.
Enjoy you SOB’s.
Level 1, 247 Gertrude Street, Fitzroy, 3065
Fri: 8pm til 3am
Sat: 8pm til 3am